Random Lists of Things

4 reasons I have cried in the past 2 weeks.

2005-08-23T13:39:00.000-04:00

1. The new academic director at my college suggesting that giving me a study skills/organizational tutor (which my disability recommendations mandate) is not accomodations, it's "enabling". Apparently, the College making sure I am able to learn is like them giving free booze to an alcoholic. I have other gripes with the new academic director, but complaining about specific people is not what Random Lists of Things is for (especially complaining not in list form).
2. Poking myself in the eye while removing a contact lens.
3. Six Feet Under's series finale on Sunday.
4. Six Feet Under's series finale replay on Monday.

10 things kids from MTV's "My Super Sweet Sixteen" did that normal, well-adjusted kids would never do for their birthdays.

2005-08-19T17:29:00.000-04:00

1. Arriving to the party in a helicopter.
2. Hiring people to dress up in tuxes and hand out invitations.
3. Having auditions with to determine which guys from a local college are going to carry you into your party.
4. Starring in a fashion show in the middle of your party.
5. Going with your dad to a strip club to audition women to dance at your party.
6. Having a hangover...from drinking too much Red Bull
7. Your parents hiring a security guard to follow you around your party and make sure that no guy dances too close to you.
8. Flying to Paris because you couldn't find a dress to wear in California.
9. People are scalping invites to your party.
10. Rollin' up in a Bentley to handout invitations at school and then rollin' out.

5 dances that I'm incapable of doing.

2005-08-19T17:24:00.000-04:00

The Roger Rabbit

The Tootsie Roll

The Electric Slide

The Cha Cha

Anything that was deemed good dancing in Save the Last Dance

5 reasons my friends have had to cancel plans with me.

2005-08-19T17:19:00.000-04:00

I have to take my dog to the vet.

I have to do something with my family

I’m really tired.

I forgot.

I’m contagious…I got scabies from the little kids I was babysitting.

1 hilarious Bob Jones University story.

2005-08-19T17:12:00.000-04:00

As told to me by a friend who debates on the same circuit as BJU

1. BJU has a looking policy. This means that if you are looking at anyone in a seductive manner you can get in trouble. Also, a bit of background. There is no dating at BJU. It is called courting and you may not "court" without both parties having a signed permission slip from their parents. Even then, you must have a chaperone. Anyway, this engaged couple was in the library sitting across the table from each other studying and they were looking into each other eyes. Soon they were busted and sent to the dean. The guy, being a smartass, said to the dean, "Well, it's a good thing that I was wearing my glasses or she'd be pregnant". Mr. Funny was then expelled from the college. Hee!

5 5 Places I will be visiting on my way back to school.

2005-08-19T14:37:00.000-04:00

1. Madison, WI
2. Milwaukee, WI
3. Evanston, IL
4. Chicago, IL
5. Erie, PA

Here's hoping that I don't get lost in Lake Forest/Gurnee, IL again.

4 Business magazines that I enjoy reading.

2005-08-19T14:34:00.000-04:00

BusinessWeek

The Economist

Business 2.0

Fast Company

16 violations at Liberty University that will get you 30 demerits and a $500 fine.

2005-08-04T07:12:00.001-04:00

The general link: http://liberty.edu/studentaffairs/index.cfm?PID=1417
30 Reprimands + $500.00 Fine + 30 hours Disciplinary Community Service + possible Administrative Withdrawal.

1. Abortion

2. Academic dishonesty

3. Assault/sexual assault (minimum two (2) semesters out)

4. Commission/conviction of any felony

5. Failure of three (3) Christian/Community Services without reconciliation

6. Illegal drugs-association/possession, use/distribution (minimum two semesters out)

7. Immorality

8. Involvement with witchcraft, séances or other satanic or demonic activity

9. Life-threatening behavior or language to others or oneself (immediate removal/exclusion from campus and a minimum of two semesters out)

10. Non-participation/disruption/non-compliance (possible removal/exclusion from campus)

11. Possession or consumption of alcoholic beverages

12. Refusal to submit to an Alco-Sensor test and/or drug test

13. Spending the night with a person of the opposite sex

14. Stealing or possession of stolen property (plus financial restitution; minimum two semesters out)

15. Two or more individuals of the opposite sex together in motel room without proper permission

16. Unauthorized possession/use of weapons

B: I have violated four of these rules. You can guess which ones (hint: I'm not down with Satan).

11 Rule violations at Liberty University that will get you 18 demerits and a $250 fine.

2005-08-04T07:12:00.000-04:00

The general link: http://liberty.edu/studentaffairs/index.cfm?PID=1417

18 Reprimands + $250 Fine + 18 hours Disciplinary Community Service

1. Association with those consuming alcohol

2. Commission of a misdemeanor

3. Entering a residence hall apartment or quad of the opposite sex or allowing the same

4. Enter bedroom of the opposite sex on/off campus or allowing the same

5. Failure to properly identify oneself

6. Falsification of information on an official document

7. Racial harassment

8. Sexual harassment (i.e., unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors or other conduct or comments of a sexual nature)

9. Sexual misconduct and/or any state of undress

10. Threat to do bodily harm

11. Vandalism (plus financial restitution)

B: Never have I ever vandalized, racially harassed, falsified official documents, committed a misdemeanor. Seriously, I haven't.

8 violation at Liberty University that will get you 6 demerits and a $25.00 fine

2005-08-04T07:03:00.000-04:00

The general link: http://liberty.edu/studentaffairs/index.cfm?PID=1417

6 Reprimands + $25.00 Fine

1. Attendance at a dance

2. Direct disobedience/disrespect

3. Disassembly or removal of residence hall furniture

4. Entering entryway of opposite sex on campus or allowing the same

5. Gambling

6. Improper social behavior

7. Possession and/or use of tobacco

8. Unauthorized room change

B: Never have I ever made an unauthorized room change.

11 Rule violations at Liberty University that will get you 12 demerits and a $50 fine

2005-08-04T07:02:00.000-04:00

The general link: http://liberty.edu/studentaffairs/index.cfm?PID=1417

12 Reprimands + $50.00 Fine

1. Attendance at, possession or viewing of, an “R”, “NC-17” or “X”-rated movie

2. Deception

3. Entering the residence hallway of the opposite sex or allowing the same

4. Entering the space above ceiling tiles

5. Out of residence hall overnight or substantial portion of the night without permission (after 2:00 a.m.)

6. Participation in an unauthorized petition or demonstration

7. Possession and/or viewing of sexually explicit material

8. Possession of a school key without authorization

10. Safety/security violation

11. Students of the opposite sex visiting alone at an off-campus residence

B: Frick! I didn't know you could get into trouble for entering the space above ceiling tiles. Why didn't anyone tell me about this?! I most certainly hope this is not a rule at Williams.

3 armed robberies that have occured in my neighborhood recently.

2005-08-04T06:54:00.000-04:00

1. At 6am one morning a guy was held up at a bus stop
2. At 1pm one afternoon a guy was held up while taking groceries out of his car
3. At some daylight hour a woman has held up on the way to the bus stop

Note: They caught the little punk who was responsible for these. I hope that he's forced to toss someone's salad in jail.

The Time Warner Cable Lineup for my area (unnumbered because I've got better things to do).

2005-08-04T06:49:00.000-04:00

2 TPT-2 PBS
3 Cable News Network
4 WCCO 4 CBS
5 KSTP 5 ABC
6 Metro Cable Network
7 TBS Superstation
8 KMWB 23 WB
9 KMSP 9 FOX
10 WFTC 29 UPN
11 KARE 11 NBC
12 KSTC 45 IND
13 KTCI 17 PBS
14 MTN City Cable
15 MTN Public Schools
16 - 17 MTN Public Access
18 Quality Value Convenience
19 C-SPAN-2
20 KPXM 41 PAXNET
21 Cable Satellite Public Af
22 WGN
23 Time Warner Television
24 Lifetime Movie Network Ea
25 ESPN
26 ESPN-2
27 ESPN Classic Sports Netwo
28 Fox Sports North
29 The Golf Channel
30 Bravo
31 Comedy Central - East
32 Video Hits East
33 Black Entertainment Telev
34 Spike TV
35 MTV Music Television
36 Turner Network Television
37 USA Network East
38 Lifetime Television East
39 Food TV
40 Home & Garden Television
41 Nickelodeon East
42 Cartoon Networks East Fee
43 TV Land
44 Science Fiction Channel
45 ABC Family Channel East
46 SoapNet
47 Univision - TV
48 Travel Channel
49 Entertainment Television
50 FX-East
51 Court TV
52 The Learning Channel
53 Arts & Entertainment
54 The History Channel
55 The Discovery Channel
56 Animal Planet
57 Women's Entertainment Net
58 The Weather Channel
59 Oxygen
60 Consumer News & Business
61 Headline News
62 Microsoft NBC
63 Fox News Channel
64 Turner Classic Movies
65 American Movie Classics
66 National Geographic Chann
67 The Disney Channel - East
68 Outdoor Life Network
69 Hallmark Channel
70 Style
71 FIT TV
72 Time Warner Television
73 Shop NBC
74 Home Shopping Network
75 MTN Public Access
76 MTN MN-DOT Live Traffic
77 MTN NASA Select
78 MTN Minneapolis
79 MTN City Meeting Channel
97 EWTN/NJT/TBN
98 ACCTV (AM)/MTV2 (PM)
99 Leased Access
116 Time Warner Cable Informa
121 - 127 TWTV-MP
200 Military Channel
201 Discovery Science
202 Discovery Times Channel
203 Discovery Home
204 Do it Yourself Network
209 Discovery Health Channel
210 History International
211 The Biography Channel
212 G4techTV
213 CSPAN 3
225 CNNfn
226 Bloomberg TV
227 CNBC World
228 Newsworld International
229 CCTV International
230 AZN Television
233 TPT KIDS
234 TPT XTRA
235 TPT YOU
236 TPT WX
237 TPT 2D
238 The Disney Channel - East
239 The Disney Channel - West
240 Discovery Kids
241 Boomerang
242 Noggin
243 Toon Disney
244 Games & Sports
245 Nicktoons
250 MBC
255 Ovation
257 Game Show Network
258 BBC America
259 Trio
260 Goodlife Television
261 America's Store
262 Fine Living Network
263 Lifetime Real Women
280 fuse.
283 VH1 Classic
287 BET on Jazz
288 Great American Country
289 Country Music Television
299 The Word Network
300 ESPN News
305 Fox Soccer Channel
306 Fox Sports Digital Atlant
307 Fox Sports Digital Centra
308 Fox Sports Digital Pacifi
309 Fox Sports Español - TV /
310 Fuel
311 College Sports TV
312 Outdoor Channel
313 Speed Channel
314 The Tennis Channel
318 NBA TV
331 Saigon Broadcasting Netwo
333 TV Asia - Asia Star Broad
334 Zee TV Programming
370 Sundance Channel East
371 Independent Film Channel
372 Fox Movie Channel
373 MoviePlex East
380 Encore East
381 Encore West
382 Encore Action East
383 Encore Action - West
384 Encore Love Stories East
385 Encore Love West
386 Encore Mysteries East
387 Encore Mysteries West
388 Encore Drama East
389 Encore Drama West
390 Encore Westerns East
391 Encore Westerns West
392 WAM!
393 Encore Wam West
400 HBO East
401 HBO West
402 HBO On Demand
403 HBO 2 East
404 HBO 2 West
405 HBO Signature East
406 HBO Signature West
407 HBO Family East
408 HBO Family West
409 HBO Comedy East
410 HBO Comedy West
411 HBO Zone East
412 HBO Zone West
413 HBO Latino East
414 HBO Latino West
440 Cinemax East
441 Cinemax West
442 Cinemax On Demand
443 More Max East
444 More Max West
445 ActionMAX - East
446 ActionMAX - West
447 ThrillerMAX East
448 ThrillerMAX West
449 W Max
451 @ Max
453 Five Star Max
455 Outer Max
470 Showtime East
471 Showtime West
472 Showtime On Demand
473 Showtime Showcase East
474 Showtime Showcase West
475 Showtime Too East
476 Showtime Too West
477 Showtime Family East
478 Showtime Family West
479 Showtime Women East
480 Showtime Women West
481 Showtime Beyond East
482 Showtime Beyond - West
483 Showtime Next East
484 Showtime Next West
485 Showtime Extreme - East
486 Showtime Extreme - West
510 The Movie Channel East
511 The Movie Channel West
512 TMC On Demand
513 TMC Xtra East
514 The Movie Channel Xtra We
540 Starz! - East
541 Starz! - West
543 Starz! Kids & Family - East
544 Starz! Kids & Family - West
545 Starz! Cinema - East
546 Starz! Cinema - West
547 Starz! on Edge East
548 Starz! on Edge - West
549 Starz! in Black- East
550 Starz! in Black - West
600 Movies On Demand
610 Movies On Demand HD
620 HBO On Demand
630 Showtime On Demand
640 Cinemax On Demand
650 TMC On Demand
700 TV Guide SPOT On Demand
702 Biography On Demand
703 Cartoon/Boomeranng on Dem
720 CNN Showcase On Demand
721 DIY On Demand
722 HGTV On Demand
723 Food Network On Demand
724 Tech TV On Demand
725 Oxygen On Demand
726 Fine Living On Demand
727 National Geographic On De
740 Golf On Demand
741 Speed On Demand
760 BBC America On Demand
761 Comedy Central On Demand
762 Court TV OD
780 My Music Channel
800 Pay Per View Movie Previe
801 - 802 iN1 Digital
840 Adult On Demand
841 Playboy Television - Adul
843 Spice Network - Adult
844 Spice 2
845 TEN - Adult
850 Sports PPV Previews
851 ESPN GamePlan
851 ESPN Full Court
852 ESPN GamePlan
852 ESPN Full Court
853 ESPN GamePlan
853 ESPN Full Court
854 ESPN GamePlan
854 ESPN Full Court
855 ESPN GamePlan
855 ESPN Full Court
856 ESPN GamePlan
856 ESPN Full Court
857 ESPN GamePlan
857 ESPN Full Court
861 MLB Extra Innings
861 NHL Center Ice
862 MLB Extra Innings
862 NHL Center Ice
863 MLB Extra Innings
863 NHL Center Ice
864 MLB Extra Innings
864 NHL Center Ice
865 MLB Extra Innings
865 NHL Center Ice
866 MLB Extra Innings
866 NHL Center Ice
867 MLB Extra Innings
867 NHL Center Ice
868 MLB Extra Innings
868 NHL Center Ice
869 MLB Extra Innings
869 NHL Center Ice
870 MLB Extra Innings
870 NHL Center Ice
881 - 887 NBA League Pass
888 ESPN Major League Direct
888 NBA League Pass
889 ESPN Major League Direct
889 NBA League Pass
890 ESPN Major League Direct
890 NBA League Pass
891 ESPN Major League Direct
891 NBA League Pass
900 Music Choice: Showcase
901 Music Choice: Today's Cou
902 Music Choice: Classic Cou
903 Music Choice: Bluegrass
904 Music Choice: R&B and Hip Hop
905 Music Choice: Classic R & B
906 Music Choice: Smooth R&B
907 Music Choice: R&B Hits
908 Music Choice: Rap
909 Music Choice: Metal
910 Music Choice: Rock
911 Music Choice: Arena rock
912 Music Choice: Classic Roc
913 Music Choice: Alternative
914 Music Choice: Retro Active
915 Music Choice: Electronica
916 Music Choice: Dance
917 Music Choice:Adult Alternative
918 Music Choice: Soft Rock
919 Music Choice: Hit List
920 Music Choice: Party Favorites
921 Music Choice: 90s
922 Music Choice: 80's
923 Music Choice: 70s
924 Music Choice: Solid Gold Oldies
925 Music Choice: Singers and Standards
926 Music Choice: Big Band & Swing
927 Music Choice: Easy Listening
928 Music Choice: Smooth Jazz
929 Music Choice: Jazz
930 Music Choice: Blues
931 Music Choice: Reggae
932 Music Choice: Soundscapes
933 Music Choice: Classical Masterpieces
934 Music Choice: Opera
935 Music Choice: Lite Classical
936 Music Choice: Show Tunes
937 Music Choice: Contemporary Christian
938 Music Choice: Gospel
939 Music Choice: Radio Disney
940 Music Choice: Sounds of the Season
941 Music Choice: Music Urbana
942 Music Choice: Salsa Merengue
943 Music Choice: Rock en Espanol
944 Music Choice: Pop Latino
945 Music Choice - Mexicana
951 CRN Digital Talk Radio
952 CRN SPORTS RADIO
953 TRN-TALK RADIO NETWORK
954 Just for Laughs
955 Radio America
956 Lifestyles Radio
960 WRNB
1020 TPT KIDS
1021 TPT XTRA
1022 TPT YOU
1023 TPT WX
1024 TPT-2 PBS
1025 KTCA
1040 WCCO-DT
1050 KSTP 5 ABC
1052 KSTP Digital
1090 KMSP 9 FOX
1111 KARE 11 NBC
1112 KARE 11 Weather Channel
1290 WFTC 29 UPN
1500 Discovery HD Theater
1505 Turner Network Television
1600 INHD HDTV
1601 INHD2 HDTV
1602 HD Net
1603 HDNet Movies
1605 ESPN in HD
1700 HBO East High Definition
1701 HBO West High Definition
1800 - 1801 Showtime High Definition
1998 Answers On Demand
1999 Digital Video Recorder

2 Things said by this dude in my lame summer course at Lame State University that didn't quite make sense.

2005-08-04T06:42:00.000-04:00

1. "Basically she's patronizing herself."
In response to my comment that a story written from a certain character's perspective would be patronizing.
2. "It's about him overcoming endurance"
In response to a Jack London story of survival.

56 Podcasts I Subscribe To.

2005-08-04T06:30:00.000-04:00

1. The Feed
2. (Cool) Shite on the Tube
3. /Nerd
4. American Copywriter
5. APM's Future Tense
6. APM's Weekend America
7. Area 51 Show
8. Baltbusters
9. BizzyCast
10. BlogTO:Podcasts Feed
11. Boston Globe Bizcasts
12. Brain Brew Radio
13. Cinecast
14. CNN Marketplace Update
15. Diggnation
16. Distorted View
17. Ebert & Roeper
18. FirstAdopter.com Show
19. For Immediate Release Podcast
20. GeekSpeak
21. KCRW's Left, Right & Center
22. Keith and The Girl
23. Marketing Chick Sushi Roll
24. MarketWatch Morning Stock Talk
25. MarketWatch Stupid Investments
26. Media Artist Secrets
27. Metro Morning from CBC Radio
28. Minnesota Stories
29. On The Media from NPR
30. Open Source
31. PRI's Studio 360
32. Queer Eye Hip Tips
33. Quirks and Quarks from CBC Radio
34. Radio Economics
35. Radio Go Daddy Podcast
36. Reel Reviews Radio
37. Science Friday
38. Simulacrum
39. Skepticality
40. Slate Magazine
41. Suicide Girls
42. Teach 42
43. The Al Franken Show
44. The Chris Pirillo Show
45. The Cubicle Escape Pod
46. The Dawn and Drew Show
47. The Good Beer Show
48.The Overnightscape
49. The Radio Adventures of Dr. Floyd
50. The Viking Youth Power Hour
51. The Whip Report
52. This Week in Tech
53. VideoGameNews Radio
54. Wall Street Journal Tech News
55. Wall Street Reporter Featured Interviews
56. WGBH Forum Network

3 Books I am currently reading.

2005-07-26T17:17:00.000-04:00

1. Delivered from Distraction
2. The Smartest Guys in the Room
3. Things to do Before You Die

8 shows that I'd rather not admit I watch.

2005-07-26T17:15:00.000-04:00

1. Gilmore Girls
2. Maury
3. Blind Date
4. The Real World
5. Being Bobby Brown
6. Blow Out
7. The Fabulous Life Off...
8. Cold Pizza

4 Favorite Chris Rock bits.

2005-07-26T17:14:00.000-04:00

1. Black people vs. niggas
2. Keepin' his daughter off the pole
3. Crazy white kids shootin' up the school
4. Martin Luther King BLVD.

2 Law and Order ADAs who were once Law and Order Criminals.

2005-07-26T17:08:00.000-04:00

1. Courtney Vance (Now: Asst. DA Ron Carver in Law and Order: Criminal Intent, Then: Benjamin Greer in Law and Order episode "Rage")
2. Diane Neal (Now: Asst. DA Casey Novak in Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, Then: Amelia Chase in SVU episode "Ridicule")

7 shows I don't watch because I think they suck.

2005-07-26T17:06:00.000-04:00

1. Hogan Knows Bet
2. The OC
3. Anything on UPN (except that America's Next Top Model and the upcoming Chris Rock Show)
4. One Tree Hill
5. 7th Heaven
6. Actually, most WB shows

29 Wacky Celebrity Baby Names w/ parents names (via VH1)

2005-07-26T15:15:00.000-04:00

Because rich people and black people love to give their kids wacky names...

1. AUDIO SCIENCE
Shannyn Sossamon (40 Days and 40 Nights)
2. BANJO
Rachel Griffiths (Six Feet Under) & Andrew Taylor
3. DENIM
4. DIEZEL
Singer Toni Braxton & Keri Lewis
5. DIXIE DOT
6. BIBI BELLE
UK TV personality Anna Ryder Richardson & Colin MacDougall
7. FIFI TRIXIBELL
8. PIXIE
9. PEACHES HONEYBLOSSOM
Parents: Live Aid founder Bob Geldof & UK TV personality Paula Yates
10. GOD'ISS LOVE STONE
11. HEAVEN
Parents: Rapper Lil' Mo & Al Stone
12. JERMAJESTY
Jermaine Jackson & now ex-wife Alejandra
13. PHINNEUS
14. HAZEL
Julia Roberts & Camera man husband Danny Moder
15. PILOT INSPEKTOR
Actor Jason Lee & girlfriend Beth Riesgraf
16. PIRATE
Korn frontman Jonathan Davis & porn star wife Deven Davis
17. POPPY HONEY
18. DAISY BOO
Parents: TV Chef Jamie Oliver and wife Julie Oliver
19. PUMA
20. SEVEN
Erykah Badu
21. REBEL
22. RACER
23. ROCKET
24. ROGUE
Director Robert Rodriguez & wife Elizabeth Avellan
25. REIGN BEAU
26. FREEDOM
Actor Ving Rhames & wife Deborah Reed
27. SAFFRON SAHARA
28. AMBER ROSE
29. TALLULAH PINE
Duran Duran frontman Simon Le Bon & wife Yasmin Parvaneh

9 tasty cereals that, chances are, will put you into a sugar coma.

2005-07-26T15:10:00.000-04:00

1. Count Chocula
2. Boo Berry
3. Marshmallow Froot Loops
4. Fruity Pebbles
5. Cocoa Pebbles
6. Cocoa Puffs
7. Cookie Crisp
8. Reeses Pieces
9. Any cereal that has a movie/tv show tie-in.

22 DVDs I Own.

2005-07-26T15:09:00.000-04:00

1. Boiler Room
2. Scrubs Season 1 Disc 1
3. Scrubs Season 1 Disc 2
4. Scrubs Season 1 Disc 3
5. Arrested Development Season 1 Disc 1
6. Arrested Development Season 1 Disc 2
7. Arrested Development Season 1 Disc 3
8. Felicity Season 1 Disc 1
9. Clueless
10. Curb Your Enthusiam season 1 Disc 1
11. Curb Your Enthusiam season 1 Disc 2
11. National Treasure
12. Daily Show Indecision 2004 Disc 1
13. Daily Show Indecision 2004 Disc 2
14. Daily Show Indecision 2004 Disc 3
15. Coupling season 4
16. Better Luck Tomorrow
17. Rogue Trader
19. Entourage Season 1 Disc 1
20. Entourage Season 2 Disc 2
21. Spellbound
22. Men With Brooms
18. Rushmore

34 phobias that I have, or at least think I have.

2005-07-21T02:09:00.000-04:00

1. Zemmiphobia- Fear of the great mole rat.
2. Xenoglossophobia- Fear of foreign languages.
3. Vestiphobia- Fear of clothing.
4. Tyrannophobia- Fear of tyrants.
5. Trichopathophobia or Trichophobia- Fear of hair.
6. Thanatophobia or Thantophobia- Fear of death or dying.
7. Taeniophobia or Teniophobia- Fear of tapeworms.
8. Scabiophobia- Fear of scabies.
9. Rhabdophobia- Fear of being severely punished or beaten by a rod, or of being severely criticized. Also fear of magic.(wand)
10. Proctophobia- Fear of rectums.
11. Politicophobia- Fear or abnormal dislike of politicians.
12. Papaphobia- Fear of the Pope.
13. Octophobia - Fear of the figure 8.
14. Odynophobia or Odynephobia- Fear of pain. (Algophobia)
15. Myxophobia- Fear of slime.
16. Luiphobia- Fear of lues, syphillis.
17. Iophobia- Fear of poison.
18. Hydrargyophobia- Fear of mercurial medicines.
19. Homilophobia- Fear of sermons.
20. Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words.
21. Helminthophobia- Fear of being infested with worms.
22. Harpaxophobia- Fear of being robbed.
23. Genuphobia- Fear of knees.**
24. Gephyrophobia or Gephydrophobia or Gephysrophobia- Fear of crossing bridges.***
25. Ergophobia- Fear of work.
26. Ereuthrophobia- Fear of blushing.
27. Ephebiphobia- Fear of teenagers.*
28. Coprastasophobia- Fear of constipation.
29. Belonephobia- Fear of pins and needles.
30. Bolshephobia- Fear of Bolsheviks.
31. Aulophobia- Fear of flutes.****
32. Ataxiophobia- Fear of ataxia. (muscular incoordination)*****
33. Agraphobia- Fear of sexual abuse.
34. Acerophobia- Fear of sourness.

*I think that this is also the fear of Ephs (Williams College students)
**And elbows.
***No, seriously, I do have a fear of crossing bridges which is problematic since I must cross the Mississippi River at least 2 times per week.
****Especially ones that people have done things with at band camp.
*****My grandpa died of Ataxia. Sorry, that wasn't funny, but it is true.

3 facts about my Random Lists of Things.

2005-07-21T02:04:00.000-04:00

1. According to blogger this is post number 148!
2. I write most of my recent lists while I am bored out of my mind in class.
3. There can never be 13 items on my lists. I have Triskaidekaphobia.

7 pieces of celebrity news that have me going "what the frick?"

2005-07-21T02:00:00.000-04:00

1. Tom Cruise suddenly being a psychiatrist
2. TomKat getting engaged
3. Frankie Muniz getting engaged
4. Britney Spears with child
5. Paris Hilton "settling down"
6. Sandra Bullock marrying Jesse James
7. Judd Law boinking the nanny (no, not Fran Drescher...ewww)

18 DVDs I own (to be updated periodically).

2005-07-20T01:35:00.000-04:00

14 different drinks my friends and I received free of charge while I was The Onion's Non-Celebrity Guest Bartender (at The Moose)*

2005-07-11T22:55:00.000-04:00

1. Jag bombs (x3)
2. Jag/peppermint schnapps shot(x5)
3. Diet Coke (x2)
4. Cherry Coke
5. glass of wine
6. HoneyWeiss (x4)
7. peach schnapps/Absolut Citron/pineapple juice/cranberry juice shot (x7)
8. Corona
9. Budweiser Select (x3)
10. white russian (x3)
11. Summit Beer (x4)
12. Grape Ape (x3)
13. Long Island (x2)
14. water

Note: The total amount the tab came to was $143. The Moose paid for $125 of it. I'm sure that drinks are properly attributed to 3 of the following people. There were 9 people. :One person had only a Diet Coke. I only had a jag/schnapps shot, a corona, and a Cherry Coke. Another person was a DD and had a shot and a beer over the course of 3 hours. Yet, another person had only 2 shots and a glass of wine. 2 people each had 2 shots, 2 beers, and a long island. 3 people drank the rest.

7 expensive-ass gifts to buy for your spoiled-ass kid at FAO Schwarz.

2005-06-25T19:05:00.000-04:00

1. Signature Gift Cards (50,000 or 100,000 dollars)
You get a free limo ride AND a personal shopper AND dessert!
2. Animated Lion ($4,800)
FAO Schwartz stresses that it is "Not intended as a toy".
3. Swarovski Crystal Etch-A-Sketch ($1,600)
FAO suggests for ages 13 and up, but you can get it gift wrapped for baby!
14,000 crystals! Bling!
4. La Petite Maison Custom Playhouse ($30,000)
standard features like 8' ceilings, recessed lighting, bay windows, and drywalled interiors, plus options such as electricity, heating and air-conditioning, miniature kitchen with running water, custom child-sized furnishings, a miniature media room, garage, and a grand staircase.
5. Zerbra Rocking Horse ($9,000)
Ok, honestly, just buy your kid a freakin' real horse.
6.Child-Size Mercedes 500SL ($16,000)
If it had been up to my mom this would have been my first car--when I was 23.
7. Junior Off-Roader ($30,000)
No thanks, I'm saving up for a La Petite Maison for my future family to live in.
Driving the gasoline-powered Junior Off-Roader is a perfect way to acquire early experience at the wheel. The Off-Roader features an all-weather fiberglass body with a protective frame, rack-and-pinion steering, dual hydraulic disk brakes, a manual emergency brake, rubber tires, and full front and rear suspension. The vehicle comes equipped with a a three-speed transmission, and tops out at 30 mph. It also has a removable, fully functional radio and tape deck, and speakers on the side doors. Your young driver will be comfortable cruising around in the adjustable upholstered leather seats.

3 toys that weren't so great in hindsight.

2005-06-25T18:55:00.000-04:00

1. Lawn Jarts
According to www.jarts.com, " Lawn Jarts have been banned for manufacturing and resale in the United States. The government of the United States has asked that all Jarts be destroyed. In no way do we encourage or condone children using Jarts. Injuries from Lawn Jarts can result in serious injury or possibly even death. " It still isn't clear why someone didn't think that youngsters hurling spears at each each other was a bad idea prior
to manufacturing Lawn Jarts.
2. Shrinky Dinks
There is nothing remotely amusing about watching plastic shrink in the oven. Disadvantaged children across America wished that they were watching food cook in their oven instead of Smurf images.
3. Sit-n-Spin
Nothing intrinsically bad with this product, it's just a waste of money. Perhaps I am bitter because my grandma suggested that I just spin in circles on my own, without the assistance of an overpriced piece of plastic.

8 issues I have with the TV show Felicity.

2005-06-20T20:43:00.000-04:00

1. as frosh the cast of Felicity looked older than most of my friends who have graduated from college.
2. There definitely should have been more drinking going on in a dorm that size.
3. What was up with those last episodes where Felicity was hallucinating and then Noel died and then I completely stopped caring?
4. Who randomly goes across the country because of some dude/girl who signed his or her yearbook?
5. Who tells that dude/gal that you stalked them across the country?
6. Who reads that dude/gal's admissions essay and then tells them about it?
7. Why do I still love Felicity anyway?
8. Why did Netflix send me a damaged DVD of Felicity.
Bitches.

4 infestations that were in the house I stayed in during dead week (yay, Sewell).

2005-06-13T20:43:00.000-04:00

1. Ants
2. Mice
3. Mosquitos
4. 1 chipmunk

3 events from my road trip home (to be updated).

2005-06-13T20:41:00.000-04:00

1. they guy in central New York who was happy to see my car because he had a license plate from Wisconsin.
2. The entire weekend in Madison
3. Missing the turn for 94 and taking HWY 41 through Illinois (I heart Lake Forest, IL)

5 reasons Luther Westside Volkswagen is a nice place to get my car repaired.

2005-06-13T20:40:00.000-04:00

1. Wifi
2. Free tasty drinks
3. Satallite TV
4. Comfy chairs
5. Toys

12 things I have been doing since being home on summer break.

2005-06-13T20:38:00.000-04:00

1. Sleeping
2. Eating
3. Interviewing
4. Trying to think of interesting lists
5. Pouting
6. Complaining about something
7. Playing with my new cell phone
8. Staring at my cell phone
9. Binge watching TV
10. Taking car to dealership
11. Taking car to car wash
12. Hoping the Star Trib actually does interview me for the comedy contest

8 more unanswered questions (11:47am)

2005-05-17T11:47:00.000-04:00

1. Why does a house with only 12 or so people and no large gathering space need an RA?
2. Why would an alumnus of a debate team take the time to write a "history" of their debate team and post it on the internet?
3. Why would an alumnus of a college create a blog about the college they graduated from almost 20 years ago, and then spend a lot of the time during the day worrying about issues that really only impact current students?
4. Why don't I have any family connections that I'd find useful?
5. Why does the registrar's office always torment me on my birthday?
6. Why do I get to do the things I don't really want to do and don't get to do the things I really want to do?
7. Am I ever going to be done with work.
8. Why did ACME move my stand up date?

4 songs that you and your friends only know part of, and chances are it's part of the chorus.

2005-05-17T11:37:00.000-04:00

1. "Informer", Snow
a licky boom boom down
2. "Rapper's Delight, The Sugar Hill Gang
i said a hip hop the hippie the hippie
to the hip hip hop, a you dont stop
the rock it to the bang bang boogie say up jumped the boogie
to the rhythm of the boogie, the beat
3. "Bad Boys", Inner Circle
Bad boys, bad boys
Whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do
When they come for you
4. "Louie, Louie", Richard Berry
Louie, Louie

14 issues I have with the Mighty Ducks movies.

2005-05-15T17:08:00.000-04:00

1. The chances Trinidad and Tobago having an ice hockey team are slim. The chances of Trinidad and Tobago's hockey team advancing to a world championship or Olympics or Goodwill games are next to none.
2. You can't go out on the ice and play without a helmet
3. You can't bring lassos and stuff out onto the ice
4. There is no way that any sort of redistricting would put a rich Edina kid with a bunch of Minneapolis poor kids
5. There's no way that kids would be allowed out onto ice without a complete set of equiptment
6. The refs appear to be blind
7. Mickey's Diner is in St. Paul, not Minneapolis. It is nowhere near South Minneapolis
8. That trophy case isn't in some fancy hockey hall. It's in the Blake cafeteria
9. Olympic/Goodwill/world championship teams are composed of the top hockey players across the nation and not from the top team in the nation.
10. It's against Minnesota State High School League rules to give out athletic scholarships. The scholarships weren't need based academic scholarships because the rich kid from Edina also received a scholarship.
11. The "Flying V" doesn't really work so well as a hockey strategy. Trust me, my JV hockey team tried against South St. Paul. We won the game, but we failed when it came to the Flying V.
12. You can't Rollerblade through the Minneapolis Skyway system. Those kids would have been arrested, or at least kicked out. Wait. There were Black kids. They would have been arrested.
13. Like I didn't get a callback when I auditioned for the movie
14. Coach Bombay must have been smoking crack if he thought that he had a chance in the pros. Then again the premise of the first movie was that he got busted for DUI. He probably was on crack. Disney just chose not to mention that.

7 things about the movie Clueless that bugged the hell out of me.

2005-05-15T16:11:00.000-04:00

1. Tai
2. Dating your stepbrother? Ewwww.
3. The song "All By Myself" wasn't on the soundtrack
4. I didn't understand what Dee meant when she said she was "technically a virgin", until I was 15
5. When they are driving on the freeway, no ones hair is blowing in the wind
6. That debate class wasn't even teaching real debate
7. The fact that this stupid girl in the the class of '01 was using the same pen with the pink feathery thing from the movie when she was a junior in high school, years after the movie came out.

21 things on my desk that serve no academic purpose.

2005-05-15T07:20:00.000-04:00

1. gavel
2. 3 juggling balls
3. lighter
4. My Little Pony
5 new toothbrush
6. tour guide to Boston
7. comedy notebook
8. family picture
9. cow-squeeze-stress-type thing
10. Mug Root Beer Can
11. Mug Root Beer Can
12. Barq's Root Beer bottle
13. Cherry Coke bottle
14. perfume
15. candy cane
16. chapstick
17. Advil (then again...)
18. hairbrush
19. peanut butter lid
20. Firewire cable
21. mini Slinky

6 insecurities of mine

2005-05-15T07:17:00.000-04:00

1. inability to dance
2. inability to parallel park
3. elbows
4. inability to do card tricks
5. tummy
6. inability to tie shoe laces using the one loop method
7. college

11 cliché high school senior pictures

2005-05-11T20:46:00.000-04:00

1. arms folded, leaning against tree
2. sitting on hood of car
3. lying down with hands clasped underneath chin
4. leaning cheek on hand
5. Both hands cradling face
6. looking off into the distance
7. wearing a tux
8. leaning against furniture
9. wearing varsity letter jacket
10. standing in front of ivy
11. leaning on/sitting next to brick wall

23 cliché dorm room posters

2005-05-11T20:14:00.000-04:00

1. "Oh Shit!" featuring kitten hanging from branch
2. "Oh Shit!" featuring the Hindenburg
3. Animal House John Belushi drinking and wearing "COLLEGE" shirt
4. Homer Simpson
5. "What I really learned in college" featuring various alcoholic beverages
6. "What I really learned in college" featuring various kinds of weed
7. Mixology (alcoholic elements)
8. Starry Night
9. Water Lillies
10. goldfish in blender "you think you're stressed"
11. Pink Floyd - Dark Side of The Moon
12. Rolling Stones tounge
13. Beatles Abbey Road
14. "Beer: Helping Ugly People Have Sex Since 1862"
15. dogs play poker
16. Any poster saying "Shit Happens"
17. Pulp Fiction (any)
18. Scarface (any)
19. Rocky (any)
20. Fight Club (any)
21. "How are you feeling" faces with various emotions
22. student crossing (drunk person crawling)
23. Bob Marley smoking

44 things I have said out loud or via AIM in the past 4 hours. Rated R. Definately rated R.

2005-05-10T02:14:00.000-04:00

1. holy motherfucker fuck
2. holy motherfucker fuckity fuck
3. what the fuck
4. fuckity fuck fuck
5. what did I do to deserve this?
6. thanks God for the sign. I appreciated the email notifying me that my book about the quarterlife crisis came in
7. I'm joining a convent
8. Once an AE always an AE
9. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
10. Yale? Yale?!
11. We totally have to date really hot really cool creatives
12. We've got some catching up to do for the 10 year reunion
13. Oh fuck!
14. bitch-ass Pagemaker!
15. Awwww...FUCK!
16. Dammit
17. Bitches ain't shit but hos and tricks
18. I hope that she's more ho-ish this weekend
19. Oh come on Pagemaker, don't do this to me
20. I hate Williams College. No really, I hate it...yeah, I know I said I hated Blake too, but really I'm not going to look back fondly on these years...Mom are you sleeping?...dammit...yes, I turned in my financial aid forms. I'm going to go now.
21. Dammit to hell.
22. Are you graduating with honors? Me neither. That's one strike against us. At least we went to good schools.
23. I hate my life
24. There's nothing the College can do about racism. People are asses. Welcome to the real world Williams College
25. I hate people
26. I want some pie
27. Hey Alyson, you should Google that
28. Nuns marry Jesus? That's right! God could be my father-in-law!
29. I'm sure that the Jesuits have seen their fair share of habits
30. Oh fuck I have a paper due
31. I'm going to read...and write an outline...and weep silently into my pillow. Actually, only one of those will probably get done and it's not reading or writing.
32. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Fuck!
33. Man, fuck that bitch
34. Fuck this shit
35. Motherfuck
36. Yeah, I'm getting a new computer. I'm already in so much student loan debt it doesn't matter. I'm never going to move out of the house. At least I can have a good computer.
37. You've got to be fucking kidding me.
38. Why the fuck did I send you that list, which caused you to Google ___________, which, well you know how the rest goes.
39. We should probably know a lot of famous people before the reunion because we aren't going to make a lot of money as account planners.
40. Oh for fucks sake
41. For the love of...of....FUCK!
42. [sobbing...not really...however, I am sobbing inside]
43. I'm hungry
44. ...nowI'm thinking he's gay. Subtle gay. Cool gay. He's not going to help you pick out clothes, but he'll give you some good advice.

6 components of the new computer I'm getting.

2005-05-09T20:06:00.000-04:00

1. Intel® Pentium® M Processor 755(2 GHz/400MHz FSB) 12.1-in WXGA
2. Microsoft Windows XP Professional
3. 1GB DDR SDRAM 2 Dimms
4. 80 GB Hard Drive
5. 8x CD/DVD burner (DVD+/-RW) with double-layer write capability
6. 65 WHr 8-cell Lithium Ion Primary Battery

14 books I've read (instead of doing work) over the past 4 months. I like to think of this list as my own "Reading Rainbow" without Lavar.

2005-05-09T18:55:00.000-04:00

1. The Underminer
Hee! Great book. Reminds me of my life. If people are always making snide comments about you, you should pick this book up.
2. Prep
Thank God I didn't go to a New England boarding school. While boarding school kids have a lot in common with Minnesota day school prepsters, they also are more frightening than we are. A friend of mine who also went to a MN day school has confirmed this.
3. The Know-It-All
Ok, so basically this dude decides to waste a year of his life reading the complete Encyclopedia Britannica. He also spends the good part of this year trying to get his wife pregnant. And no, this book was not fiction. AJ, the guy in the book, basically writes about his favorite facts A-Z and then ads witty observations about his life. Some are wittier than others.
4. Miracle Man
Remember Ben's Life in Seventeen? The same guy, Ben Schrank, wrote this book about a guy who is a Robin Hood type. This book wasn't so hot. I miss Ben's Life.
5. Consent
Mr. Schrank strikes again. Grad student's love crisis. 2 thumbs down.
6. Daily Shows w/ Jon Stewart...America
Hee!
7. How to Lose Friends and Alienate People
This dude worked for Vanity Fair and then got fired because he was obnoxious. However, he is British, which means he has a cool accent, which means he's ok by my book. Nonfiction.
8. Conquering Your Quarterlife Crisis
Yes, I am a 20 something going through a crisis. What that crisis is, I am still unclear on.
9. Truth, Lies, and Advertising
Account planning!!!!
10. The Tipping Point
Why things catch on.
11. Blink
Why you have a feeling that this weeks episode of The Real World is going to suck.
12. Privilege...
Harvard dude bitching about how his Harvard education let him down. Oddly, enough if he hadn't gone to Harvard he wouldn't have been able to publish this book. My recommendation: Shut the Fuck Up, Harvard Boy. Also, stay tuned for my book Privileged Yet Again: My time at Williams College.
13. He's Just Not That Into You
(note: Worst Book Ever. All Greg B. says the entire book is the title. The book could have been 3 pages long)Why you can't get a date. Or some such nonsense. I stopped reading a quarter of the book in. Yes, I was having a quarter-book crisis.
14. Gossip Girls
God, I don't know why I was reading teen fiction. I thought it was for adults. Yet another book that confirms my feelings on east coast prep school kids.

8 unanswered questions I have at 5:20am (to be updated).

2005-05-09T05:13:00.000-04:00

1. What don't the Backstreet Boys want "that way"?
2. Is it sex?
3. Why are they releasing new music?
4. Why does Electric 6 want "to take you to a gay bar"? It seems that they like girls, so I am confused.
5. Why do I enjoy watching Grey's Anatomy?
6. Why don't I have a job yet?
7. Why does the entirety of Canada sound like they are from Minnesota (or vice versa)?
8. What "genius" decided that New England needed roundabouts?

14 ways that I am unlike 50 Cent.

2005-05-08T17:47:00.000-04:00

1. I'm a girl
2. I haven't ever been shot, let alone shot nine times
3. I can't rap
4. I've never met Eminem
5. I don't have a kid
6. My non-existant kid and I don't have matching bullet proof vests
7. I like boys
8. I've never met Vivica Fox
9. I don't even know where south side Jamaica Queens is (However, I'm thinking Queens, NY)
10. I can pronounce squirrel
11. I don't have an endorsment deal with Reebok
12. Ja Rule and I have never had a feud
13. I never had my friends shot after they betrayed me
14. I can't dance

33 states where one can purchase alcohol on Sundays.

2005-05-06T12:37:00.000-04:00

1. Alaska
2. Arizona
3. California
4. Delaware
5. Florida
6. Hawaii
7. Idaho
8. Illinois
9. Iowa
10. Kansas
11. Kentucky
12. Louisiana
13. Maine
14. Maryland
15. Massachusetts
16. Michigan
17. Missouri
18. Nebraska
19. Nevada
20. New Hampshire
21. New Jersey
22. New Mexico
23. New York
24. Ohio
25. Oregon
26. Pennsylvania
27. Rhode Island
28. South Dakota
29. Vermont
30. Virginia
31 Washington
32. Wisconsin
33. Wyoming

4 cradle robbing celebs.

2005-05-05T21:24:00.000-04:00

1. Demi Moore
2. Cameron Diaz
3. Hugh Heffner
4. Tom Cruise

2 things I've set on fire trying to microwave them dry.

2005-05-05T19:12:00.000-04:00

1. My advertising to-do notebook
2. My Adidas wristband

7 stupid things I've said.

2005-05-05T18:57:00.000-04:00

1. I liked the murder in the book. Why? Because I've had a bad week
2. I really want to be the advertising manager
3. What if I didn't wear pants to class today?
4. I couldn't remember which pedal was the brake so I just thought I'd let it come to a stop
5. Officer, I'm from Minnesota (wait, that worked)
6. I once dated an android
7. Perhaps I should take my backpack, that way if I get arrested I'll have a quiet place to study

8 bad things that I've never done but that finals might drive me to do.

2005-05-05T18:40:00.000-04:00

1. smoking cigarettes
2. smoking crack
3. joining the NRA
4. watching Dawson's Creek during the day on TBS because I'm too lazy to get up and do something productive or because I've been up for days and I'm a zombie. Either one.
5. throwing textbooks out my window
6. eating condiments as meals
7. randomly attacking people with a whiffle ball bat (I'd do it like this, I'd do it like that...)
8. randomly singing 90s one-hit-wonders while walking across campus (I like fi-nals and I cannot lie, you other students can't deny. Hold on. It seems that I can lie.)

3 things I quit this year, but will probably pick up again next year.

2005-05-05T18:34:00.000-04:00

1. debate (actually, I probably won't)
2. W(h)ufo (ultimate frisbee)
3. caring

2 reasons why I read "Seventeen" magazine past the age of 12.

2005-05-05T18:33:00.000-04:00

1. "Ben's Life" column by Ben Schrank
2. I had nothing else to read while sitting under the dryer

Places that I am working this summer.

2005-05-05T18:32:00.000-04:00

11 reasons why I will be weeping silently in my room for the next 2 weeks.

2005-05-05T18:30:00.000-04:00

1. 5 page paper for Dostoevsky
2. 10p research paper for Dostoevsky
3. 6 page paper for political theory
4. 6 page paper for political theory
5. 6 page paper for cold war
6. 5 page paper for political theory (optional)
7. 8 I page papers for political theory
8. 3 page article review for Dostoevsky
9. Political Theory final
10. Cold War final
11. college paper advertising stuff

6 people Laura Bush claimed were at Chippendales (no, seriously, she jokingly said these people).

2005-05-03T15:01:00.000-04:00

1. Laura Bush
2. Condi Rice
3. Lynne Cheney
4. Karen Hughes
5. Justice Ginsburg
6. Justice O'Connor

3 book titles from abstinence website w/ suggested subtitles/comments(I just can't get enough of that site).

2005-05-03T14:53:00.000-04:00

1. Sex Has a Price Tag
B: Only if you go to a prostitute.

2. I Kissed Dating Goodbye
B: Me too! However, I did because I'm lazy and dating is too much work. Hoping mom arranges marriage for me.

3. The Everyone is NOT Doing It Book.
B: True. Only the majority of your friends. The VAST majority.

3 types of pie I like.

2005-05-03T14:50:00.000-04:00

1. Blueberry
2. Apple
3. Cherry

4 free meals that I have had/will have today.

2005-05-03T14:41:00.000-04:00

1. Indian Food
2. Pizza
3. Wings
4. Fondue

3 actual responses to sex from abstinence website and 1 I made up.

2005-05-03T14:33:00.000-04:00

1. Nobody will know.
-Are you calling me a nobody?
B: precisely

2. We'll be better friends.
-Should I sleep with all my friends?
B: yes indeed.

3. I'll still love you in the morning.
-Good 'cause I won't be here
B: ooh. Good move. Sneak out in the morning. Just make sure your parents don't have to pick you up.

4. Please.
-I have [insert favorite STD].

3 actual posters from abstinence site and 1 poster I made up.

2005-05-03T14:28:00.000-04:00

1. Herpes Kills Dates
2. Sex Causes Babies
3. Guys Don't Get Pregnant
4. They're called condoms

http://www.hh76.com/default.asp

3 times that I might post again.

2005-05-02T18:52:00.000-04:00

1. After 11:30pm today.
2. Tomorrow.
3. Later tomorrow.

Sorry guys, I'm busy. I'd rather not fail my classes.

4 comebacks to drug dealers that I learned in middle school.

2005-05-02T18:50:00.000-04:00

1. If I'm a chicken, you're a turkey
2. No
3. My parents would kill me if they found out
4. $10!!!!???? Are you out of your mind? How about buy one get one free? Honestly!

8 "prestigious" names given to babies born in California in the 1990s.

2005-04-30T06:51:00.000-04:00

1. Harvard (8, all black)
2. Yale (15, all white)
3. Princeton (18, all black)
4. Doctor (0)
5. Lawyer (3, all black)
6. Judge (8, white; 1, other)
7. Senator (3, all white)
8. President (2, all black)

And before you ask, I don't know how many were named: Williams, Amherst, Depauw, Georgetown, Minnesota, Boston, Marquette, or any other institution of higher learning. However, if I had to guess I'd say that any Amhersts and Bostons are likely to be white. Any kid named Williams after Williams College is probably white. All other Williamses are probably black. I'd bank on most other college names to be black babies. Except Bob Jones, those are probably white babies.

I was surprised that all of the Princetons were black considering that all 15 Yales are white. I am not surprised that the Harvards are all black. I feel bad for the Harvards and Yales in the world regardless of their race, but I see nothing wacky about naming a your kid Princeton. I'd name my kid Princeton. Sure. I wouldn't be cruel enough to allow that kid to apply to Princeton though, because chances are he'd get rejected and then he'd end up at Yale or something and then he'd be Princeton the Princeton reject at Yale. The Yales at Yale would probably kick his ass everytime Yale lost to Princeton in something (that is, when they aren't kicking the asses of the Harvards at Yale).

I wonder how many parents named their kid God. However, I don't care enough to track down the statistics. I could, but I don't want to. So there.

Source: Slate Magazine: http://slate.msn.com/id/2116505/

20 names that black and white boys born in California in the 1990s are most likely to share.

2005-04-30T06:45:00.000-04:00

1. Vincent
2. George
3. Troy
4. Christian
5. Martin
6. Corey
7. Brandon
8. Eric
9. Craig
10. Frank
11. Cameron
12. Shawn
13. Micah
14. Gregory
15. Nathaniel
16. Marc
17. Aaron
18. Dominic
19. Theodore
20. Isaac

I know/have personally met names: 1, 2, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 12,13,14, 15,17. I have met Martins, Coreys, Aarons, Brandons, Shawns of both races. The rest are white people.

Source: Slate Magazine: http://slate.com/id/2116449/sidebar/2116470/

20 names black and white girls born in California in the 1990s are most likely to share.

2005-04-30T06:43:00.000-04:00

1. Andrea
2. Whitney
3. Alicia
4. Kendra
5. Alexandria
6. Natasha
7. Tiffany
8. Brittany
9. Amber
10. Talia
11. Erika
12. Brianna
13. Ariel
14. Gabrielle
15. Veronica
16. Alana
17. Kyra
18. Ashley
19. Breanna
20. Erica

I know/have personally met people with names: 1, 2, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 18, 19, 20. There is a ton of crossover for most of these I know black people AND white (and other races) people with the name.

Source: Slate Magazine: http://slate.com/id/2116449/sidebar/2116470/

20 "blackest" names given to boys born in California in the 1990s.

2005-04-30T06:40:00.000-04:00

1. DeShawn
2. DeAndre
3. Marquis
4. Darnell
5. Terrell
6. Malik
7. Trevon
8. Tyrone
9. Willie
10. Dominique
11. Demetrius
12. Reginald
13. Jamal
14. Maurice
15. Jalen
16. Darius
17. Xavier
18. Terrance
19. Andre
20. Darryl

Oh snap! I am 20 for 20 on these names. Also, a couple of the names I know boys AND girls with that name. I can't believe that I actually know a Demetrius, but I do! My new goal in life is to meet a white person named Tyrone.

Source: Slate Magazine: http://slate.com/id/2116449/sidebar/2116469/

20 "whitest" names given to boys born in California in the 1990s

2005-04-30T06:38:00.000-04:00

1. Jake
2. Connor
3. Tanner
4. Wyatt
5. Cody
6. Dustin
7. Luke
8. Jack
9. Scott
10. Logan
11. Cole
12. Lucas
13. Bradley
14. Jacob
15. Garrett
16. Dylan
17. Maxwell
18. Hunter
19. Brett
20. Colin

Oh double snap! I'm 20 for 20 again. However, I know both whites and people of other races with the following names: Dylan, Maxwell, Cody, Dustin, Jacob.

Source: Slate Magazine: http://slate.com/id/2116449/sidebar/2116469/

20 "blackest" names given to girls born in California in the 1990s.

2005-04-30T06:37:00.000-04:00

1. Imani
2. Ebony
3. Shanice
4. Aaliyah
5. Precious
6. Nia
7. Deja
8. Diamond
9. Asia
10. Aliyah
11. Jada
12. Tierra
13. Tiara
14. Kiara
15. Jazmine
16. Jasmin
17. Jazmin
18. Jasmine
19. Alexus
20. Raven

I personally know/have met people with names: 1, 2, 5, 6, 7, 9, 13, 14, 18, 19.

Does spelling make the difference between it being a black baby name and a white baby name. With the exception of one person, all the Alexises I know are white...

Source: Slate Magazine: http://slate.com/id/2116449/sidebar/2116453/

20 "whitest" names given to girls born in California in the 1990s.

2005-04-30T06:33:00.000-04:00

1. Molly
2. Amy
3. Claire
4. Emily
5. Katie
6. Madeline
7. Katelyn
8. Emma
9. Abigail
10. Carly
11. Jenna
12. Heather
13. Katherine
14. Caitlin
15. Kaitlin
16. Holly
17. Allison
18. Kaitlyn
19. Hannah
20. Kathryn

Except for 11 and 7, 15 I know white people with these names. A couple of the names I know white people AND other races with the same name. I know several white people for whom both their first and middle names appear on this list. I don't think spelling should really matter unless the parent spells it a really wacky spelling. For example Catherine and Katherine and Katheryn should all count as one. However, K'aathryine is a completely different story (and chances are that this kid is black. We blacks get all crazy with the alphabet/apostrophes . White people on the other hand, are fond of making turning Cs into Ks [and vice versa], Ys into Is [vice versa]...). Also, before you say something I am aware of the common spelling of my name and all my mom did was change a letter. I'm a black person from Minnesota. I'm an anomaly. Will think up better excuse later.

Source: Slate Magazine : http://slate.com/id/2116449/sidebar/2116453/

51 things you should know about Minnesota and me.

2005-04-30T01:08:00.000-04:00

1. I can pronounce Shakopee, Wayzata, Mahtomedi
2. Any cabin is "up north" even if it is south of where you live (also, you have a cabin even if you don't know it)
3. You live "on the lake" no matter where you live. No, really, you do. Trust me.
4. It's duck, duck, grey duck, bitches
5. I'm not asking for pot, you aren't asking for heroin, you are asking for pop...you know, like Coke or Pepsi
6. The U of M does not refer to Michigan
7. I've had school cancelled because it was too cold outside
8. A foot of snow doesn't even result in a school opening delay
9. Downtown is technically uptown and Uptown is technically downtown
10. It's freeways not highways
11. After a good night of partying I enjoy going to Perkins
12. I haven't paid more than $7.oo to see a movie in Minneapolis.
13. The only thing worse than being from Wisconsin is being from Iowa
14. No one really thought that Jesse Ventura would get elected
15. Perhaps the reason I don't sound like anyone in the movie Fargo is because I've never even been to Fargo. Also, Fargo isn't in Minnesota.
16. I don't say hot dish
17. Most Minnesotans don't like to go to the Mall of America that often, myself included
18. I get angry when I have to wear a coat while walking around a downtown area. What do you mean everywhere doesn't have Skyways? That's stupid.
19. I didn't go to the "U" because I didn't want to go there.
20. Minneapolis' ghettos are probably your city's upper middle-class housing
21. 40 degrees or more is shorts weather
22. 50 degrees or more is tank top weather
23. I can get anywhere using any freeway ending in 94
24. Yes, yes my school was in Mighty Ducks 3 (and 1 and 2)
25. I don't know why I don't sound like I'm "Minnesotan" oh yeah, I do. I'm not white.
26. I could do without St. Paul. Actually I could do without Ramsey County.
27. I don't know why people call dinner supper. I sure as hell don't.
28. The big city (NYC, Boston, Chicago) is frightening to me. Not because I feel unsafe but because of the loud noise.
29. A typical Minnesotan traffic jam is when two people are trying to be polite at an intersection. Neither of us wants to go first.
30. Like you had to ask me what type of hockey I played. No one in MN has ever heard of field hockey, let alone played it.
31. I've been to the SPAM museum
32. Stomach? That's so formal. I prefer Tummy
33. Really, I swear that my family isn't the only black family in town. There are a ton of us.
34. What the hell is a full-service gas station?
35. I don't understand why the guy at the auto parts store in MA thought it was so weird that I was looking for an ice scraper in the beginning of September
36. Wait, you have to pay for air to fill up your tires?
37. During the winter several of my friends have thrown water in the air and had it come down as slush
38. Typically, in high school when my friends went "out" on Friday/Saturday nights, we went to a friend's house and watched a movie.
39. No one in my high school class had a fake ID until after they graduated from high school
40. You didn't have to wear snow pants to school?
41. Hold on. Northwest Airlines doesn't go everywhere?
42. No, you don't have to go to school in the same city you live in. Not even if you are in public school. Wait, all your classmates lived near you? Wow.
43. I don't know how to give directions in terms of miles. However, if you need to know how many minutes it will take, I've got you covered.
44. I can't believe that your streets aren't alphabetized/named after presidents in chronological order/on a grid.
45. Who knew that "dale" wasn't a suffix meaning mall?
46. When I say that I'm woozy because I gave blood, I mean that I am woozy because of all the mosquitos attacking me.
47. You can't ice skate? What kind of sick people raised you?
48. I'm weirded out by the fact that there is only 1 Lutheran church in town.
49. Yes, it is true that at the best club in Minneapolis, the VIP section is open to anyone
50. Your news starts at 11pm? Wow. That's late. 10:30 is bedtime.
51. Holy cow! You can buy alcohol on Sundays here?!? That's awesome.

14 signs of a good night on the town.

2005-04-30T00:28:00.000-04:00

1. You wake up with pants on
2. No one had to be bailed out of jail
3. No one has died
4. You have the same amount of tattoos/piercings you had yesterday
5. You remember your name
6. You wake up inside of a place of residence, and not in a car, in the front yard, ect.
7. You are confident that whatever you did last night/this morning isn't going to appear on Cops in a few weeks
8. You had no warrants for your arrest before you started partying yesterday and you are fairly confident that you still have no warrants out for your arrest
9. Your friends don't turn Sunday morning brunch into an impromptu intervention based on what you did the night before.
10. Whatever you did last night, none of your friends can bust you on because they were 10 times more messed up than you were.
11. Since you were the DD you get to make up stuff about what your friend's did last night and no one is going to call you on it. Except maybe your friend who doesn't drink, but then again, she's totally in on the joke too. Hee!
12. Fox/CNN/etc. does not interrupt late-night TV to televise a car chase involving you and your friends
13. You come home late enough to catch at least the last 15 minutes of a Ronco infomercial.
14. You don't have to come up with a good excuse for asking your parents to contact the US Embassy in country X, to help you get back home
15. You weren't in Williamstown, MA

3 "incidents" involving campus squirrels and me.

2005-04-29T16:40:00.000-04:00

1. after a night of drinking I tried to go up a set of stairs toward my dorm. squirrel would not move. stare down lasts anywhere between 5 seconds and 5 minutes, I really wouldn't know, I was drunk.
2. driving down mission park drive in order to get back to my dorm. squirrel stands in middle of the street and stares at me. squirrel ignores the my hand sweeping back and forth through the air, the universal sign for "go ahead and cross". by then other cars are behind me waiting. honk horn. squirrel still doens't move. squirrel loses interest and returns to the same side of the street he was originally on.
3. was studying and snacking next to open window (I have a "deck" outside of my room). Left cookie on ledge and went to the bathroom. Return to find that squirrel has taken my cookie and is eating it on the otherside of the "deck" with his bitch-ass squirrel friends.

6 injurys I have sustained in the past 24 hours.

2005-04-29T16:15:00.000-04:00

1. pulled groin checking mail
2. paper cut on hand reading The Daily Show with Jon Stewart Presents: America...
3. paper cut on elbow after falling asleep reading The Daily Show with Jon Stewart Presents: America...
4. strained upper arms after trying to power walk back to the dorm from Hopkins Hall
5. nicked self with razor after accidentally stepping on it in the shower
6. got shampoo in my eyes in the shower this morning

45 things the cats/kittens in my wal-mart cat-a-day calandar are on, in, next to, or up to.

2005-04-29T12:03:00.000-04:00

1. basket (numerous)
2. flower pot
3. french horn
4. tiny wicker chair
5. toy firetruck
6. dresser drawer
7. shelf
8. mirror
9. log
10. ladder
11. hanging from tree branch
12. kitten sized garbage cans
13. an old fashioned phone
14. watering can
15. bowl
16. jack-o-lantern
17. pumpkin patch
18. chicks
19. a kitten sized wishing well (the kitten is in it)
20. apple
21. between the spokes of a non-moving wheel
22. floating in a basket suspended by balloons
23. stack of books
24. cat-sized bench
25. a table win an American flag on it
26. building blocks that spell out "I Love You"
27. parrot
28. 10 kittens in a basket
29. podium
30. next to painting of a tiger
31. kitten-sized shopping cart
32. grammaphone
33. held by real monkey
34. a horse
35. kitten-sized wicker baby carriage
36. yarn
37. picture frame
38. broom
39. kitten-sized deck chair
40. fish bowl
41. going after fish in fish bowl
42. viola
43. ornaments
44. vase
45. clock

12 things often written in high school yearbooks.

2005-04-28T19:05:00.000-04:00

1. Homeroom was a blast!!!!!!
2. Don't ever change
3. I hope we have some classes together next year
4. [just signature]
5. You're so funny!
6. I'll always remember the fun times
7. Sorry I slept with your boyfriend
8. Have a great summer!
9. I don't know your name but you seem cool
10. I've never talked to you and you might be an okay person but, I swear, if you even try to pull a "Felicity" and follow me to college I'll slap a restraining order on you in a New York minute. Have a great summer and rest of your life!
11. Remember that one time when we were at Z's birthday party and we kept prank calling..Q...Oops. My bad. I just remembered that it was you we were calling. We were just kidding. Seriously, we were. Send me a post card from Europe!
12. The name of the owner of the yearbook and nothing else*

*definately a personal favorite.

6 of the best Ronco products ever (aka the Ron Popeil hit list).

2005-04-28T18:53:00.000-04:00

1. electric food dehydrator and beef jerky maker
2. dial-o-matic food slicer
3. showtime rotisserie and bbq oven
4. deluxe solid flavor injector
5. popeil's pasta maker
6. GLH formula number 9 hair system

4 steps to college campus reform.

2005-04-28T18:34:00.000-04:00

1. girlfriend/boyfriend tariff: if your significant other does not attend the same school as you, you must pay a tariff everytime he/she visits. This tariff will go towards buying alcohol for your hapless, single classmates.
2. private sleep accounts (PSAs): students are allowed to put hours of sleep lost to late-night group projects/study groups in a personal account where sleep will gain interest and students will be able to withdraw from their accounts later on during their college career. Note: PSAs are rather risky since no one ever catches up on sleep until they die.
3. public displays of fucking police (PDoF P): These brave souls patrol parties and remove any people who are pretty much fucking on the dance floor. PDoF Ps also have juristiction over ugly couples dancing too close to each other, because really, no one needs to see that.
4. harsh punishments for repeat "corresponders under the influence" (CUI): students who repeatedly send incoherent emails/instant messages, or leave voicemails so slurred that the recipient has no idea what the message is about, will be subject to their messages being forwarded to several list-servs the following morning.

7 overrated letters.

2005-04-28T18:30:00.000-04:00

1. I
2. X
3. Z
4. C
5. love
6. fan
7. sometimes mr. y

5 revolutionary fast food ideas.

2005-04-28T18:25:00.000-04:00

1. An overabundance of a sauce that no one eats (Arby's)
2. nationwide distribution of sporks (Kentucky Fried Chicken)
3. free body parts with purchase (Wendy's)
4. first use of dude in a large purple costume (McDonald's Grimace)
5. use of meats that aren't even good enough to put in dog food (Taco Bell)

4 underrated organs

2005-04-28T18:24:00.000-04:00

1. spleen
2. pancreas
3. skin
4. church

2 World's Strongest Man winners that I can actually name.

2005-04-28T16:02:00.000-04:00

1. Magnus Ver Magnusson. 4 time World's Strongest Man winner. He's from Iceland and he's still bitter that Bjork stole his thunder (and that she wore that God awful swan costume to the Oscars. WTF?!).
2. Phil Pfister. Actually, Phil has only won the U.S. Strongest Man. He was 4th in the World's Strongest Man contest. Whatever. Also, his name sounds dirty. Hee!

4 great World's Strongest Man events.

2005-04-28T15:53:00.000-04:00

1. keg toss. The men try to lob a keg of beer backwards over a wall. Suprisingly, no one has died during this even. At least that we know of. I mean, their names all basically sound the same, so it wouldn't really be that hard to replace one of them...
2. truck pull. Self explanatory. A little known fact is that some of the strong men work as tow trucks during the off season. No, they don't drive the truck; they are the truck.
3. squat. Instead of lifting weights the men lift what/whoever they can find. Usually children and/or sexy women are lifted.
4. tire flip. Need I say more? No? Well, I will anyway. I tried to replicate this even the other day when my tire was being changed at the tire store. I am the grand champion of "Tire Warehouse". Well, at least I was the grand champion until they needed they made me return the tire so that they could put it on my car. That and I made up the last bit about being the "grand champion of Tire Warehouse". Oh, I went to "Tire Warehouse" but what really happened is that I stood around looking at the various car airfresheners and thinking about how hungry I was. Then I paid, got in my car and left.

7 events that I can't believe are televised on sports networks.

2005-04-28T15:43:00.000-04:00

1. poker
2. The National Spelling Bee
3. The National Debate Tournament (college)
4. darts
5. flag football national championships
6. Miniature Golf National Championships (which were actually kinda cool but still shouldn't have been televised)
7. cup stacking (you don't know how badly I wish I was making this one up)

12 states where black people make up 0.3%-2.1% of the population (submitted by Trout).

2005-04-28T15:28:00.000-04:00

1. oregon
2. idaho
3. montana
4. utah
5. wyoming
6. north dakota
7. south dakota
8. iowa
9. maine
10. vermont
11. new hampshire
12. hawai'i (traditional spelling)

10 answers to a 7th grade social studies test.

2005-04-28T07:26:00.000-04:00

1. T
2. T
3. T
4. T
5. T
6. T
7. T
8. T
9. T
10. T

2 MTV shows that I hope come out on DVD.

2005-04-28T04:04:00.000-04:00

1. My Super Sweet 16
2. PowerR Girls*

*Because as coasters PGs DVDs would be interesting conversation starters. Also, I need something to burn while I am standing in Times Square during TRL protesting MTV's poor programming choices and holding up my sign that says, "I Love [insert artist]" and randomly screaming after any song on the count down is announced. But mainly because I need coasters.

7 things on my iPod that will cause my family to feel great shame and embarassment.

2005-04-28T03:50:00.000-04:00

1. "Ninja Rap", Vanilla Ice
2. "Shoot, Pass, Slam", Shaquille O'Neal
3. "Summer Girls", LFO
4. The entire Ashley Simpson CD
5. The entire Lindsay Lohan CD
6. "Ass-n-Titties", DJ Asphalt
7. He's Just Not That Into You" audiobook

6 less than accurate translations of the motto "E. Liberalitate E. Williams Armigeri*" on the Williams College seal.

2005-04-28T03:35:00.000-04:00

1. Don't hate they player, hate the game
2. Not William and Mary
3. No, seriously, our mascot is a purple cow
4. Insert witty motto here
5. If you can read this you are standing too close to the seal
6. We're so classy it hurts

* The actual translation is roughly: Through the generosity of E. Williams, Solider

5 things I should clarify about me and Bob Jones University.

2005-04-28T03:15:00.000-04:00

1. There was never a decision between Bob Jones University and Williams. I was joking. It turns out that you have to qualify to even be allowed to apply to Bob Jones University, and since I couldn't give up doing the robot and listening to gangsta rap, there was no way I would be allowed to apply.
2. My college counselor also suggested that I not apply to Bob Jones University. Additionally, BJU is in South Carolina, which is definately below the Mason-Dixon line.
3. Even if I qualified to apply to BJU and my college counselor suggested I should apply to Bob Jones University, I never would.
4. Students at Bob Jones University aren't going to be able to get in a huff about anything that I post here because they can't see this website because they have filtered internet and I'd be beyond surprised if this made it through the filter. Really fuckin' surprised (There. Now I know it won't make it through the filter.) Hee!
5. If a BJU student does get in a huff (I got all my BJU info from the BJU website) I'll have to turn his/her in to the BJU Dean's Office for getting around the filter because it might be a Williams honor code violation if I don't. Probably not, but I'm already well enough aquainted with Williams' Dean's Office, so better safe than sorry.

10 things that people have told me I'd be bad at being.

2005-04-28T03:08:00.000-04:00

1. Junior Advisor
2. parent
3. police officer
4. serial killer ("you'd be like Wile E. Coyote. no one would ever get killed")
5. olympic swimmer
6. surgeon
7. socialite
8. especially a stay-at-home parent
9. nanny
10. teacher

10 things that are only considered "part of a balanced diet" during reading period and finals.

2005-04-28T02:53:00.001-04:00

1. Hostess Cupcakes
2. root beer
3. Cherry Coke
4. Pie (apple or cherry)
5 . Skippy peanut butter
6. Colonial Pizza
7. Passion fruit smoothies from the snack bar
8. Fish 'n' chips from Boston Seafood in North Adams
9. Mountain Dew
10. Cocoa Puffs

8 reasons I won't be posting a ton of lists for the next 24 hours.

2005-04-27T16:43:00.000-04:00

1. "Poor Folk/"The Overcoat" paper
2. Crime and Punishment paper
3. part of The Brothers K.
4. ad manager application
5. setting up for Wyclef
6. sleep
7. food
8. Blogger will more than likely get messed up again

6 careers I've given up on.

2005-04-27T16:42:00.000-04:00

1. Doctor
2. Lawyer
3. Consultant
4. Engineer
5. Architect
6. Trust fund baby

8 radio stations I listen to in my room (via radio and/or internet)

2005-04-27T16:39:00.000-04:00

1. BBC 3
2. BBC 4
3. BBC 5
4. BBC World Service
5. WBUR (Boston Public Radio)
6. WPR (Wisconsin Public Radio)
7. KNOW (Minnesota Public Radio)
8. WAMC (Albany Public Radio)

7 things people have in their away messages that annoy me to no end.

2005-04-27T16:28:00.000-04:00

1. Writing "please don't bother me" in the away message. Why don't you just log off?
2. Just writing "Away"
3. Deep quotes
4. Song lyrics (unless being ironic. "funny ironic" not "sad ironic".)
5. Random rants about how much your life sucks. (note: people are allowed 2 rants per mo. unless they are funny rants, which are ok)
6. Over use of emoticons
7. Viruses

24 things my friends became when they grew up. (note: many of these people haven't finished "growing up")

2005-04-27T16:18:00.000-04:00

1. grad student
2. bond analyst
3. marketing analyst
4. barista (multiple people)
5. undergrad (multiple people)
6. nurse
7. account planner
8. account planning coordinator
9. account planning intern
10. market research
11. sales person
12. prospective intern
13. thespian
14. tech support person
15. med school student (multiple)
16. public relations exec.
17. Princeton Review teacher
18. Teacher
19. hopeful med school student
20. law school student (multiple)
21. Investment banker
22. Nomadic
23. Nice
24. Attractive

9 Things people in MN have said upon learning I go to Williams College

2005-04-27T16:09:00.000-04:00

1. Williams? You mean Williams and Mary...Oh, right William and Mary...where's Williams?
2. Massachusetts? That's far.
3. Why didn't you go to the "U"?
4. How do you like Boston?
5. Is that a community college?
6. Are there any black people there?
7. That's a good school. You do know it's a good school, right?
8. What airport do you fly into?
9. You still haven't graduated?